The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch

I have seen links to Randy Pausch's last lecture on the internet, and recently noticed that he had also written a book expanding on the lecture he gave at Carnegie Mellon.  I was curious about the hype and drawn to his story of living with a terminal diagnosis, but I was worried it might be too sad to get through.  I got through it fine, but it didn't change my life.  I think Randy Pausch has some great insights and perspectives and he shared them in a really approachable way.  It reminded me of books like Don't Sweat the Small Stuff, All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten, or Life's Little Instruction Book.  All fine books, but not really my favorite thing to read.  This book is, of course, set apart with personal stories, and always with the understory that this man knows he only has a few months left to live.

When he was asked to give the lecture, he asked himself:  "What do I, alone, truly have to offer?"  I think that is a worthwhile reflection for all of us.  He also mentions a coach that taught him,  "You've got to get the fundamentals down, because otherwise the fancy stuff is not going to work."  That made me think of teaching.  You have to teach them basic principles and values or the other stuff doesn't stick.

On building self-esteem he says, "You give them something they can't do, they work hard until they find they can do it, and you just keep repeating the process."  I like that, and it resonates with several things I've read lately.  I think about that a lot raising my kids!

There was a section about his habit of leaning back in his char at dinner and how it drove his mom crazy.  I kind of get his point, but my boys have broken a few chairs in our house that way, so it was kind of annoying to read.  I sympathized with his mom more than him!

There's a section where he shares that he would send a box of Girl Scout Thin Mint's with every paper he asked another professor to review, along with a short note.  "Thank you for agreeing to do this...The enclosed Thin Mints are your reward.  But no fair eating them until you review the paper."  Clever.  He finished the section with, "I've found Thin Mints are a great conversational tool.  They're also a sweet reward for a job well done."  I think that is a good example of his "voice" in this book.  I found it annoying sometimes.  But he also mentions that he's aware of his "social" flaws.  A mentor once told him, "Randy, it's such a shame that people percieve you as arrogant, because it's going to limit what you're going to be able to accomplish in this life."  He does sometimes come off as arrogant, but then again, he did accomplish A LOT in his short life.

There are chapters where he says that, "brick walls are there to stop the people who don't want it badly enough.  They're there to stop the other people."  There's another section titled, Earnest is Better Than Hip.  He explains "the head fake" and then refers to it a few times. Some of these sayings and sections seemed a little too cliche to me.  The seemed dumb.  I think to really do Randy Pausch justice, I need to watch the video of his lecture.  I think in a more concise format, it might move me more.

I was most touched by the chapters about his family that he concludes with.  It is such a tragedy to lose your father or husband, and to loose him at such a young age and so early on in your marriage is really heartbreaking.  He concludes his lecture by explaining that one of the main reasons he wanted to give it, and expand it into a book, is so his children can know him.  So he can pass on the wisdom he won't be around to give them.  I think that is beautiful, and I admire him for taking the time to write the book.

If You Could See Me Know by Cecilia Ahern

I tried to start reading this a couple times, and I felt like the beginning was just too much.  Too much information, too forced, and I didn't really like the writing.

But because I've put down a few books lately, because the main character is named Elizabeth Egan (!), and because I liked the idea of the plot, I kept reading.  Honestly, the whole first half kind of got on my nerves.  I think the story was OK, but the writing style and the characters kind of bugged me.

Elizabeth has had a sad life.  Her mom abandoned her family, she mostly raised her sister and her dad is emotionally distant.  And now she is raising her nephew because her sister is terrible mess. Elizabeth is kind of a control freak, but is successful in her career and her younger life is revealed haphazardly throughout the book.  Her nephew meets an imaginary friend "Ivan" who take turns with Elizabeth in telling the story.  So because she is lonely and needs him, eventually Elizabeth can "see" Ivan and their friendship helps to relieve some of the sadness and pain in her life.  Imaginary friends come to help children with what they are struggling with and he does the same for Elizabeth.

Because I knew what the story was about, I decided to follow the book through to the end.  I know some people love it, so you might too.  But for me there were just too many annoying things.

There is a meeting of the Imaginary Friends, and they all give a report of their friend they are helping.  The conversation is so trite.  Like maybe the author looked up reasons kids have imaginary friends, then created the profiles by going down the list.  It was dumb.

Then there's this cheesy conversation between Ivan and Elizabeth when she's trying to figure out what his job is.  In fact a lot of the conversations between them are supposed to be clever with Ivan attempting to answer her literally as she misunderstands over and over.  Assuming he's Sam's dad, then assuming he's a silent partner, that he works with children, etc.  It was annoying to me.

So many times I felt like the whole character of Ivan was a copycat of Will Ferrell's character in Elf, and maybe even a little borrowed from Tom Hank's character in Big.  Like a child trapped in an adult's body, but most of what he says seems really profound, and only sometimes ridiculous.  Everytime he says things like, "spinning is my favorite"  I couldn't help but hear Will Ferrell's Buddy's voice.  Not very original.

I will say that the overall idea and story is heartwarming.  The idea that Ivan could fill a void in Elizabeth's life and help her learn to love again, is very sweet.  There is this moment of clarity when Elizabeth relives a tragic moment from her childhood, that seems to embody all her fears, and give her all the answers she's been running away from.  I felt like it was almost great.  It was a little too tidy for me, and the writer was trying too hard for me to really get into it.

Here are a couple of sweet quotes.

"My special power is friendship.  I listen to people and I hear what they say.  I hear their tones, the words they use to express themselves, and most importantly, I hear what they don't say.  Sighs and silences and avoided conversations are just as important as the things you do talk about."

"Those were the best times because her mother would be in one of her happy moods, delighted to be home, telling Elizabeth how much she'd missed her, smothering her with hugs and kisses so much that Elizabeth couldn't remember ever feeling sad."

I read the back flap of my library copy of this book and learned two things that say a lot.

A) Cecelia Ahern is 24.  Or was when the book jacket was made, which means that she was even younger when she wrote this.  Maybe her writing with improve with age.  (PS.  She wrote the book P.S. I Love You)

B) Film rights to this book have been bought by Walt Disney Pictures.  I bet they could make a pretty good movie out of this story.  With the right editing, it could be a really good story, the book just didn't pull it off in my mind.

The Adoration of Jenna Fox by Mary E. Pearson

I put this book on hold based on Tara's recommendation.  I liked it.

The story begins with a 17-year-old girl, Jenna Fox, who has come out of a year long coma and is struggling to remember everything.  I thought the beginning was a little boring, but I think that is intentional because Jenna is so awkward and confused at first.  It gets better as she makes friends, and begins to solve the mystery of her "accident" and her recently awakened self.

This is science fiction, and poses ethical questions about what might be possible in the future of bio-medical advances.  I thought that aspect was interesting, but really its just not my favorite genre.  What made this book interesting to me was the idea of how parents expectations or dreams for their kids influence their ethics.  I thought the title was very clever. 

"Jenna is so used to every move being recorded at this point that she seems to have surrendered herself to the adoration of Jenna Fox."

"Sometimes a person gets tired of being fixed all the time.  Where every little problem becomes a project.  Where every shortcoming needs to be addressed."

I don't expect my kids to be perfect (have you met my kids?), but I do want them to find one true passion and excel at it.  I want them to be good at something, or a few things, and reading this made me think about my dreams for them.  Do I adore my kids enough as their normal selves?

Although I found it thought-provoking from a parent's point of view, I think the best audience for this book is a female young adult.  Maybe 12-16?  I passed it on to my son who is 12, and he read it on the way too and from an outing and finished it.  He liked it too.  He did point out a few things they mention but don't develop much, but if I mention them it will spoil the book.

The Pioneer Woman: Black Heels to Tractor Wheels -- A Love Story by Ree Drummond

I'm sure I've visited The Pioneer Woman's blog before, I've certainly heard her name around, and always connected to good things. I keep seeing ads for her new TV show, so I was really interested in reading this book.

I really enjoyed reading this fun story of how she and her husband met. Like so many of us, they met when she was at a crossroads in her life, and their relationship drastically altered her future. She has a pleasant writing style, and while her story could have been too romanticised and gaggy, it's not. Her re-telling made me feel sentimental about my own love story, and brought back those emotions that you feel when everything is so new and so uncertain.

Both Ree and "Marlboro Man" as she refers to her cowboy are like able personalities. I liked the embarrassing stories that she shares of their early relationship, and I understood many of the stresses and heartache in their first year of marriage. I think her writing style is comfortable and relate able, and a nice way to spend a couple of evenings. You can read it fast, and it won't change your life, but you'll enjoy it.

Here are a few of those relate able excerpts:

"To talk about our future would be premature; but to totally dismiss that we'd happened upon something special wouldn't be right, either. Something extraordinary had occurred between us--that fact was indisputable. It was the timing that left so much to be desired."


"And I knew it, even then: Marlboro Man, not only that night but in ht emonths to come, would prove to be my savior, my distraction, my escape in the midst of troubles, my strength in the face of upheaval, my beauty in times of terrible, heartbreaking ugliness."


"I was exhausted, unable to make it through one day without crying or gagging or worrying. I'd fallen in love, married a cowboy, and moved to the peaceful, bucolic contryside. But it was peace that eluded me the most."


"Any identity I'd previously had as a wife, daughter, friend, or productive member of the human race had melted away the second my ducts filled with milk."

Savvy by Ingrid Law

This is a fun quick read that I would say would be most appealing for 4th and 5th graders.  The story is told through Mibs Beaumont, who comes from a family with special powers.  They refer to them as "savvy" and the special "how-to" usually appears on the child's 13th birthday.  Of course the savvy is powerful, and it takes time and effort for the kids to keep it in control.  As a result, one of her brothers started an hurricane on accident, and another quite often causes power outages.

Right before her 13th birthday, Mibs' father is in a horrible accident.  Most of the book is about the adventure she and two of her brothers go on trying to get to the hospital to see him. 

I think it teaches simple lessons about the difference between what people show on the outside, and what they are on the inside.  It is sweet and simple. 

The Optimistic Child by Martin Seligman

Proven Program to Safeguard Children from Depression & Build Lifelong Resilience

This book was recommended to me during a parent advisory committee meeting by the assistant director of elementary ed of my kids' school district.  She was talking about how gifted kids often have depressive thoughts because their intellect is so far ahead of their maturity level.  Like they are aware of problems and injustices that they don't have the life experiences to cope with yet.  This made sense to me, and I do have some concerns about depressive tendencies in some of my children, and I was very interested in this book.

I have really enjoyed reading it.  It is specific and precise in explaining the philosophies and then how-to's of Dr. Seligman's ideas.  It has taken me a long time to get through the whole thing, but considering the amount of this type of non-fiction books that I set aside and don't finish, my determination to get through it is a testament to it's value in my eyes!  I have taken tons of notes and am going to buy my own copy.

Here's a good quote that comes near the end, "Raising children, I realized, is more than fixing what is wrong with them.  It is about identifying and amplifying their strengths and virtues, and helping them find the niche where they can live these positive traits to the fullest."  Yep.

Dr. Seligman's basic idea is that you can vaccinate children against depression by helping them be more optimistic.  He is careful to explain that "optimism will not make the problems disappear.  On the contrary, it allows your child to get to the root of the problem so that she can focus on correcting the situation."  He is also very concerned with the scientific proof that his Penn-Prevention program has been successful.  He gives a lot of data and examples.  I didn't care as much about this.  But I suppose it helps you know he isn't just making things up. 

I've decided not to try to outline his whole book and the philosophies, and instead share with you a few nuggets that rang true with me.

A big part of his program is teaching your kids to evaluate the things they tell themselves.  To notice the dialogue in their head and then take control of it, "we aimed to teach children that thoughts are verifiable and changeable, that they do not need to believe the first thought that pops into their head."  Recognizing what we are telling ourselves, and realizing that it isn't always accurate seems like a really important skill.

"Children who habitually blame themselves when they fail have low self-esteem. They feel guilty and ashamed. Children who blame other people or circumstances.....feel less guilt and shame and they like themselves better. They are also angrier children."

One part that I've been talking to everyone who will listen to me about is the "ABC model."  It was developed by Albert Ellis who helped found cognitive therapy (this means nothing to me).  "The A stand for adversity.  An adversity can be any negative event: a failed vacation, a fight with a close friend, the death of a loved one.  The C stand for consequences: how you feel and behave following the adversity.  Often it seems that the adversity immediately and automatically produces the consequences.  Ellis, however, argues that it is the B--the belief and interpretations about A--that cause the particular consequences."  So if I get a D on a test, I might tell myself I am stupid and worthless and won't ever succeed. Or I might tell myself that my teacher is a jerk and writes bad tests. Or I might tell myself that I didn't study enough and I need to work harder next time. Consequently, I would feel depressed, mad or disappointed.

"Although thinking about the worst case--catastrophizing--can be productive in some situations, it is counterproductive in some situations, it is counterproductive when the worst case is actually very unlikely.  In these cases, planning for the worst is a bad use of your time.  It is a drain on your energy, and it ruins your mood."
There is a cool quiz you can give your kids to test their optimism levels.  It is based on bad and good events, and whether your child perceives them as permanent or changeable, whether the responsibility is theirs or another, and how pervasive it is in their life.  That was also very cool.  I gave it to my two oldest, and the results were very interesting to me.

There are three chapters of discussions and role playing and assignments to work on with your kids that are modeled after his Penn Prevention program.  While I haven't followed this, I have had some conversations with my kids using these ideas.  One example is reading a dialogue of a boy at a school dance and what he tells himself after he is turned down for a dance.  Then you explain to your kid, "When Greg thinks___, he is explaining his rejection by Cindy with Permanent thoughts.  This causes Greg to feel sad and he decides....." Then of course there are contrasting dialogues that show other possible reactions.  I liked reading through these, and thought they were valuable in explaining and really spelling out what his program is about. 

There is valuable information about depression.  For example, "The depressive's habit of thinking that the future is bleak, the present unbearable, the past filled with defeat, and the self without the ability to improve matters creates the low mood, the lack of zest, and the somatic symptoms of depression." And, "teach the depressive to change her habits of thinking, to decatastrophize, and all the rest of the symptoms would evaporate."

There is a section about the right way to criticize.  This was perfectly logical and helpful to read.  It goes well with the right way to praise that I learned in NurtureShock. "The first rule is accuracy.  Exaggerated blame produces guilt and shame beyond what is necessary to galvanize the child to change....The second rule is that whenever reality allows, you should criticize with an optimistic explanatory style.....When they blame changeable and specific causes of the problem, the child begins to learn optimism.  Any time you find your child to be at fault, it is important to focus on specific and temporary personal causes....and avoid blaming the child's character or ability."  He uses lots of examples to illustrate his points.

At times phrases are repeated and some ideas even seem repetitious, but it didn't get on my nerves like some books.  And given the length of time it took me to get through this, sometimes I even liked the reminders!

I have more good quotes, and I feel like I'm just barely touching on the content of this book.  But I'm going to stop now.

I recommend you read it, then we talk about it!  I found it enlightening, helpful and I am excited to continue implementing it in my life and my childrens' lives.

The Lost Summer of Louisa May Alcott by Kelly O'Connor McNees

My mom loaned me her copy of this book.  I liked the story, and I think it's cool that someone would attempt to fill in some of the unknowns about a beloved author.  The idea of researching all they can, finding holes, then using facts and imagination to fill them in appeals to me.  I think that's why I liked this book.

The story is exactly what the title says.  It takes place during the summer of 1955 when the Bronson Alcott familymoves to Walpole, New Hampshire.  Louisa comes alive as a young woman who desperately wants to be a writer and struggles with society's rules and expectations for her. "Why would God give a woman talent if He meant her to be confined to the kitchen and washtub?"  Her character is of course similiar to Jo, and the story for awhile seemed too much like a Little Women copy cat.  But then as I got more into the romance, and the inner struggle that Louisa wrestles with, I felt like it did have merit of its own.

I loved studying the transcendentalists in high school and college, but I don't remember a whole lot about Bronson Alcott.  It was interesting to read the author's ideas, which are probably fact-based, about the effects that having a highly philosophical father might have had on his daughters.  Bronson refused to work for money, and so the family was always poor, however their mother Abagail thought constantly of those less fortunate, and gave away anything they might store up.  I hadn't really thought about how living those transcending ideals would work in a family.  Thoreau could go live at Walden without depriving anyone but himself, but the Alcott daughters didn't have a lot of options themselves.  This theme is mentioned a few times throughout.  Emerson is portrayed well here, and it made me wonder how many of his friends he helped keep afloat!

Joseph Singer is introduced as a young man who might be a intellectually stimulating match for Louisa.  They  connect over Walt Whitman's Leaves of Grass, so of course now I've got to read it.  Louisa describes it,
"Her father would say that the chaos of life, its unpredictability, existed to challenge one's commitment to improvement, that one must extract himself piece by piece out of the wildness and assemble a spirit that transcends the sum of mere body parts.  Mr. Whitman seemed to say, rather, that the wildness itself was the thing to cultivate.  For him, the spirit and the flesh were one, the physical experience of the world was divinity."
Then she says that men will go on arguing these matters forever, "The women, meanwhile, would continue to peel the vegetables and soak the linens in boiling tubs and mend the torn seams and bring new lives into the world."

Another thing this book reminded me of was how much work there was to be done in 1855.  These young women spent so many hours of each day doing menial tasks.  I feel that way a lot, but reading this made me so grateful for my leisure time.  For not having to mend clothing each day, or wash dishes by hand, and glad to have vacuum cleaners.

As a reader, I wanted Louisa to fall in love, to believe Joseph when he says, "There are some men out there who are charmed by an independent woman, who feel that marriage can be an equal partnership of head and heart.  Who would love you just as you are..."  But I do like her choice at the end better than her choice in the middle.  I don't want to spoil much, but if you read this, lets talk!

I also thought this comment was insightful, because haven't you heard people try that excuse before?
"I think this real love you talk about is only an excuse for selfishness.  It is the love of an inpatient boy, not a grown man.  A grown man knows that in life we may not always simply have whatever we want."

I liked this book and I think it was a fun idea for a story.  I think this qualifies as a fun, light summer read.

Moon Over Manifest by Clare Vanderpool

I'm pretty sure I put a hold on this book after hearing about it from my cousin Betsy, but I can't remember.  I haven't written a review for awhile.  I'm still working my way through The Optimistic Child, which I am really liking, and it's just been a busy end of school-start of summertime around here!

This book was a nice dive back into novel reading for me after taking a few weeks off.  You know how I love a spunky 12 year old girl protagonist!  Abilene has been sent to live with strangers while her father works on the railroad for the summer.  She is brave and knows how to take care of herself, but is still lonely for her father that loves her and worries that their separation might not be temporary.  She has a sweet voice, and talks about "universals," the things you can count on in any town.  Things like snobby rich girls, chalky classrooms and things "everyone knows" except the new girl.

Abilene is anxious to learn more about her father's life in Manifest, and is searching for any stories about him.  There's a really poetic part where she notices footprints all over the wood floors, and wonders if any might be her father's from when he lived there.  She sets off to discover the mysteries hidden in a box of letters and mementos she has found.  As she reads the letters, her neighbor Miss Sadie fills in more stories.  So the book switches back and forth from 1936 when Abilene is living in Manifest, to 1918 when her father was living there.  I think the two stories weave together well.

I liked how the characters were nice!  The circumstances were often sad surrounding both Abilene and Jinx, but you could feel that they felt safe and loved in Manifest.  My favorite part was when the town (in 1918) worked together to outbid the coal mine bosses for some property.  It was a perfect example of coming together and making something good out of what seems like a hopeless situation. (Even if it did involve alcohol and a con!)

"'Amen,' they said in unison, these citizens of the world, and they held their breath as the many and varied ingredients that had been simmered and stewed, distilled and chilled, were combined to make something new.  Something greater than the sum of its parts."

There were times when the story felt a little slow to me.  Like there were a few threads going, and many of them weren't going anywhere.  The search for "the rattler" for instance, seemed to go by the wayside, then was wrapped up at the end without much to do.  And Sister Redempta, who I loved, seemed to fade away too.

I liked the characters in this book, but didn't really fall in love with them the way I hoped.  The small town setting, characters trying to discover more about their past, growing up, working together, these are the kind of themes that endear books to me, but this one fell a little short for me. 

BUT, I would recommend this.  It is a good read.  I think it would be great for anyone who likes heart-warming stories, and especially if you like historical fiction.  I would recommend it for kids too.  Maybe 9 and up?  This is Clare Vanderpool's first book and it won a Newbery medal! I'm looking forward to reading the next books she writes and I hope I like them even more!

The Honey Thief by Elizabeth Graver

I think this book was OK. Because the characters and the story had so much potential, I think it could have been a really great book, and it fell short. (Mine had different cover art, but I couldn't find the image)

The chapters alternate between three different characters' perspective, but their stories are wrapped up together.  Miriam is mother, whose husband died a few years ago, and she has just moved her daughter out of New York City because she is worried about her. Eva is her 11-year-old daughter who had started shoplifting small items, and is lonely in their new house out in the country.  Burl lives near Miriam and Eva, and runs a little farm.  Eva begins hanging out around his place, and as he teaches her about keeping bees, they become friends.

I really liked reading the dynamics between Miriam and Eva.  They were sad and even painful at times, but you feel like there is hope for their relationship.  You want to sit them down and mediate!  Both were interesting characters.  In Miriam's chapters, she goes back and explains her whole relationship with Eva's father, Francis.  I think that may have been my favorite part, even as it ended in tragedy.  Burl was interesting too, but I got a little distracted by his relationship with Alice.  I felt like I wasn't always getting enough information to really understand who the author intended him to be.

I was also annoyed by what seemed like unneeded little sexual details.  Little shocking phrases or moments.  And there is this one scene that is so unnecessary and so uncomfortable.

The writing was really beautiful at times.  I liked when Miriam heard her deceased mother give her instructions, advice and courage.  I liked the self-reflection in each of the characters. 

Here are a few good quotes: (Which I just realized are all from Miriam's chapters!)

"Watching him, she felt an almost painful tenderness for all the muffled parts of people, all the far, far parts."


"Later, when she thought back on that night, Miriam would be struck by how time was the most elastic, the most flexible of properties, a year in a minute, an hour in a second."


"It's over, she had said, but it was over and not, just like he was Francis and not, just like this was a life she could want an regret at the same time."

I think ultimately, I wanted to find out more about Eva. Is she just going through a tough time in her life, or is she teetering on the edge of mental illness. Is anyone going to try to figure out? Will she please open up to someone about her fear and compulsions? I didn't need a perfect, tidy ending, but I needed more than the writer gave.

The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks by Rebecca Skloot

I was given this book for my birthday by my fabulous sisters.  When I first read the back of the book, I thought the topic was very interesting, and I would definetly like to read an article about it.  At the same time, I kind of worried that an entire book might be a little too much.  BUT, I was pleasantly surprised.  I would have read this all in one sitting if I lived that sort of life!  I did read it as much as I could during the day, and way later into the night than I should have.  The book focuses more on the human story of HeLa, than the scientific importance.  The science is definitely there, but it is explained in a way everyone can understand and relate too.  I think maybe because I can relate to Rebecca Skloot (really just being the same age and race) more than the Lack family, I enjoyed that her efforts to get the information and write the book were also included in the story.  (I read a couple reviews that did not appreciate this aspect.)

Henrietta was a poor black woman who grew up working on a tobacco farm with her extended family.  Shortly after the birth of her fifth child, she found out she had cervical cancer.  This was in 1951, she was treated, but the cancer spread and she died.  Samples of both her healthy cells and cancer cells were taken by scientists at John Hopkins when she was treated, and the cancer cells were the first human cells to survive and keep reproducing outside the body.  This was revolutionary, and the cell line called HeLa changed the world in many different ways.  Everytime Rebecca Skloot lists off scientific advances that have used HeLa, it is impressive. 

 Even though they were responsible for taking the cells without asking or informing Henrietta and her family, I really enjoyed reading about George Gey and his wife Margaret.  I liked that Gey built his labs out of scrap metal and  invented amazing things for scientific research without patenting them.  He sent the HeLa cells to anyone who was using them for scientific research.  I feel like his motives were good, he wasn't looking for fame, he was just a really smart guy that was obsessed with science.  I enjoyed the simplified explanations of how cells were used, and how specifically HeLa's cells allowed scientists to study so many different things. 

Henrietta's family really suffered after she died.  Her children were mistreated and abused by the cousin who came into take care of them.  I actually skipped a couple of pages that went into detail about this.  Three of her kids were still really young when she died, and an other one had been institutionalized for epilepsy and other illnesses.  Luckily, the oldest brother married a woman, Bobette, that figured out what was going on and rescued the kids.  Sadly, the damage had already been done.  Add to that poverty, un-diagnosed hearing problems and struggles with the law, and her children had really hard lives.  When they were asked for blood samples years later, bits and pieces of the history of their mother's cells were explained to them.  But not explained well.  They each struggled with it in different ways.  I think their reactions are well-justified, and as they slowly confide in the author and explain their experiences, you can really understand why they each reacted they way they did.  Some of the descendants wanted financial retribution, which is also understandable since they are all struggling with different illnesses, and many don't have health insurance.  Ultimately, they just want people to know who their mother was, and better understand themselves.

Much of the story comes from Deborah, who was only 2 or 3 when her mom died.  She has a lot of spunk, and definetly grows on you as she searches for information about her mom.  I think the biggest tragedy in the book is not that the cells were taken, but that those 5 kids lost their mom when they were so young.  I'm sure they would have still had struggles, but if they had had Henrietta to love them and teach them, I think things would have worked out better.

Rebecca Skloot explains different advances in patient privacy and disclosure.  She outlines different agencies' attempts to prevent what happened to the Lacks family from happening again.  But doctors can still store and use your cells without you knowing.  As I read the different issues and concerns, I wondered how I would feel if I found out 20 years later that my cells had been used.  Honestly, if anyone asked me, I would happily donate blood or tissues for scientific research.  I know when different kids of mine were born, we were asked to participate in different studies.  I find that kind of stuff fascinating.  One of them is in a data base for hearing loss, when my last baby was born we were finally able to donate cord blood.  I'm sure if it isn't used for a transfusion, they'll use it for research, and I'm really OK with all that.  One study even says that my appendix that was removed a while back could still be around in a lab somewhere.  But I'm OK with that.

I recommend this book.  It will be different than anything else you've read.  It is very interesting, educational and thought-provoking.  It seems to be very popular, so I'd love to hear what you thought of it.